Disclaimer: When I received this Bible Study book to review, I showed it to my husband and he immediately began reading it. He has browsed through many books concerning marriage and the power of the wife within marriage. According to him, all books concerning wives and marriage are the same – respect your husband; be submissive to your husband; be a keeper of the home; take care of the children; love your husband; earn your husband’s respect; wear modest clothing in public; blah blah blah. What he read, however, was not like any other book he had read on this subject. So, I asked him to do a review on this book. I wanted to get a man’s take on the contents and how it relates to a husband’s needs. Here is what he had to say:
Him-Wow! I picked up this Bible Study and couldn’t put it down. When my wife showed it to me, I thought to myself, “Great! Another Bible Study with generic and bland information that is supposed to empower the wife and encourage her to be weird about respecting, loving and cherishing me as her husband!” I’ll just say that I had a nice surprise and after reading this book. I was quite humbled. Finally, someone gets it!
“Passion Pursuit: What Kind of Love Are You Making?“, written by Linda Dillow and Dr. Juli Slattery, is a Bible Study that extends out of the comfort zone for many women and men for that matter. This is a Bible Study written for women that speaks to the mind and heart of the wife when it comes to understanding her husband.
I will admit that most Bible Studies tailored to women have great information and relevant scriptures concerning marriage and the wife. However, many of these studies don’t get to the heart of the matter, which are the husband’s desires. Let’s face it, many Christian women buy these Bible Studies to change something in the realm of their marriage. That change could be a self change – how to be a better wife; how to respect your husband; how to manage your time wisely; how to be a better home maker; how to be more financially responsible; the list goes on. Or that change could be a husband change – how get your husband to be a better leader; how to make your husband love you like you deserve to be loved; how to get your husband to love you as Christ loved the church; etc. There are more reasons for purchasing a Bible Study, but you get the gist. However, as stated before, what exactly are the husband’s desires and how can you meet those desires?
Linda and Juli do just that: get to the nitty-gritty, so to speak. This study is full of scriptures and stories, both personal stories from the authors’ experiences and also stories from other people. Each section also has an application. The authors challenge the reader to expound on a certain scripture or key words/phrases and apply them to their married lives. I, personally, think this is a fantastic idea! This is a simple exercise that causes the reader to critique themselves and their marriage. Some of these questions are difficult, but isn’t marriage at times? I had to swallow a lot of my pride and step away from my biased feelings to give an honest account. I thoroughly enjoyed the applications.
Did I forget to mention that this is a Bible Study on Sex for women? Ooops! My bad! These two ladies have hit the nail on the head when it comes to how a man thinks in the realm of intimacy. It sounds somewhat like pun, but it is true. Husbands can be intimate (at times), but probably not the way, nor as often, as the wife would like him to be. The authors address this issue and many more.
Linda and Juli also talk about God’s opinion on sex. In fact, the authors go on to say, “God has an opinion about sex. He also has an opinion about pleasure. He is wholeheartedly, enthusiastically, unequivocally in favor of out-of-this-world sexual pleasure in marriage.” Wow! Who would have ever thought that? But when we really dig down deep into God’s design of man and woman, doesn’t this make sense from a logical standpoint? Don’t get it twisted. This design is only acceptable in the confines of marriage, in which the authors address this.
Linda and Juli break down and dissect many topics concerning sex and intimacy. They address what is acceptable and what is not acceptable. They address how sex outside of marriage is a sin and the effects it can (and most likely will) have on future marriage. They address the taboo topic of adultery. They address a debt-free intimacy. They address companionship. They address forgiving and forgetting. I could go on for about an hour or two about the topics that are addressed. They leave no stone unturned.
Finally, to the part of the study I probably enjoyed the most: well, I’m sure you can guess what that is (if not, ask your husband…haha). The authors describe the basic differences between men and women when it comes to sex. I’ll give a few examples:
1. Men – Sex leads to feelings of love
1. Women – Feelings of love leads to sex
2. Men – Wants sex in order to relax
2. Women – Must relax in order to have sex
3. Men – Wants immediate direct stimulation in one place
3. Women – Wants to be touched everywhere delaying direct stimulation
As I was reading these differences, I could only imagine me and my wife. Every description of men was a direct reflection of me. Every description of women was a direct reflection of my wife. Finally, someone bold enough to write about it gets it!
Lastly, in one of the chapters, Linda and Juli ask the women specific questions that I thought was amazing. The questions are in a section of the book titled “Getting behind Your Husband’s Eyeballs”. As I read these questions, I could hear my wife’s voice because these are the EXACT questions she has asked me! These ladies answer these questions that just makes sense. I basically answered these question in the same way, just not as many words, or detailed, or creative, or based on factual evidences. Fine, you got me, I didn’t answer these questions nearly as educated or expertly as the authors did. However, they said exactly what I was trying to say.
I don’t know what number scale my wife usually gives books. Since I’m doing this review, I give this Bible Study a 5 out of 5; 10 out of 10; 100 out of 100. I highly recommend this study. These two ladies have taken their own personal experiences, years of study, and God’s Word, and put them in this Bible Study on Sex for Women. I also encourage you to allow your husbands to read it. If your husbands are anything like me, they can relate to much of this study. Hopefully, this will answer your questions you have concerning your husbands and his needs and desires.