Characteristics of True Friendship
I have come to realize and cherish true and faithful friendships throughout my life. I have had many friends in my life, but only a few have stood by my side over the years. We each have friends that come into our lives for only a season, but we also have friendships that last a lifetime.
My own best friends and close circle of Godly ladies has had both- some who have come and gone, others who came but didn’t leave- yet weren’t my oldest friends like my very best friends. How do we know what true friendship is though? Well, here are some characteristics of true friendship below.
(My Best Friend and I in High School)
True friendships go through the harder parts of life together and become stronger. In the joyful times, you make those special memories and continue to grow stronger together. Whether you live next door or miles apart, nothing can take you away from a true friendship.
We know it’s been six years ago that you went to Heaven because your sweet baby, the one on your chest as you passed from this world is now six. However, it’s still so hard to believe you are gone. Both your babies are wonderful, everyone loves them. You left us all a legacy and sweet friendship. You are missed and still loved. Thank you for the honor of friendship Julie. Love you! #ArmyWife #ArmyLife #NoTearsInHeaven #HighSchoolFriends #SistersInChrist #BarboursvillePirates #BandGeeks #AltoSaxaphone #FriendshipForever #SeeYouInHeaven
(In the picture above it is my sweet friend Julie. That was posted on my instagram 2 years ago. At the time of writing this, just today it has now been 8 years since she past. She was truly a gift from God. Here for a season, waiting to see her at the big house.)
A Godly friend is selfless.
This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. John 15:12
Are you too busy to help a friend in need? Do you see a friend post a status on Facebook that they have a need that you might be able to help with if you just set aside the time?
Wait….did that friend on Facebook ask for help? Probably not, but sisters, we should offer our assistance regardless. The Bible talks about having a servant heart and part of having that character trait is being selfless. We become selfless by offering our time, our resources and our energy for someone else.
Keep in mind, however, that I am not suggesting we offer our time to the point that our own household suffers by neglecting our duties as a wife and/or mother. Unfortunately, I am guilty of this at times myself.
I might see someone with a need that I can help meet, but it might inconvenience me at the time. Instead of offering my time selflessly, I simply reply, “I am praying for you.” Ladies, prayer is
good great! We should pray about everything and without ceasing. But we are also called to be the hands and feet of Jesus. We may be the only Bible that some ever read. What sermon do you want them to see?
A True Friend is a prayer warrior.
And the LORD turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends: also the LORD gave Job twice as much as he had before. Job 42:10
Likewise the Spirit also in our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. Romans 8:26
Again, using Facebook as an example, how often do you see a post from someone asking for prayer? If you do not have a Facebook account or any other social media account, how often do you HEAR a person ask for prayer? How often do you reply, “I am praying for you”? Probably pretty often I am sure.
However, how often do you actually stop what you are doing RIGHT THEN and pray for that need? Do you follow-up later to see if that need was filled or the prayer was answered? Do you forget to pray for that need or forget to follow-up?
Ladies, we need to be prayer warriors. If we say we are praying for someone, we need to make sure we are doing just that! We also must be more intentional in our prayers and also following up with the person we are praying for. We must do this for them and also for ourselves.
What if there is something in addition to praying you can do to help meet this need or answer this prayer? Also, we should care enough to want to see the result. As Christians, I believe it is also good to see and know the miraculous ways God works.
We have been friends for 35 years. Today we laid to rest Carla’s mom. She was a truly wonderful second mom to me. I will never forget the lives she touched for the Lord. She was a true servant of Christ. She gave so much to our community, church, and children’s lives she touched. Till we meet again. #tillwemeetagain #heavenbound #crownofglory #faithfulservant #bestfriends #bestfriendsoursisters #thirtyfiveyearsoffriendship
. (Same best friend as pictures above and my cousin who is like a Sister to me. Both are very very dear to me. True, Godly friends.)
A True Friend Listens.
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: James 1:19
How many times does a friend share something with you, but you try to “one up them”? How bout if they are having a problem and you decide to turn it around on yourself?
For example, your friend is having a bad day, but you’re having a bad week; or your friend prayed for and was blessed with a new job, but your prayers brought you an even better job? A Godly friend listens and is patient. She offers Godly advice but also realizes that sometimes she just needs to be a shoulder to cry on and be present for moral support.
I tell my kids they should listen 90% more than they talk. Listening more than we speak is a great trait to have. I know we all want to share and sharing is a good thing, but there is a time and a place for that.
A True Friend Is For All Seasons
A true friendship lasts through all seasons of your life. Your not just friends with them when you both are attending the same school, pregnant at the same time, or both have little kids, and then distance yourselves when you are not on the same path of life.
A True Friend Has Deep Conversations
You can confide in your friend with things you are going through and feel like they support you and help you through the struggles. You can talk about your passions, dreams, and you support each other. You know when you do sit down to talk to your friend, that they listen to you and have your best interest at heart (James 1:19).
A True Friend Has Grace
With a true and lasting friendship, you have grace for each other. You might hurt each other (Ephesians 4:32) here and there along the way. But also keep in mind that grace is given freely and we forgive when needed and that is where we find grace.
We are all retired #militarywives who joined together in this season for @plantingroots conference! It was an amazing weekend! I have so much to say, which will probably be a post soon. 😉 God showed up and y’all, it was just what I needed. It was wonderful reconnecting with old friends and Sisters from other duty stations and past @thehubpwoc Sisters! It was wonderful making new friends too! #ArmyWife #MilitaryMinistry #Military #ArmyLife #FortCampbell
A True Friend Encourages
Friends encourage each other along the way. Through each chapter of your life, you cheer the other one on and give support and love! You also voice differing opinions in an encouraging way to ensure that you are honest and loving and want the best for your friend.
A True Friend Is Empathetic To Each Other
You mourn the same sadness as your friend when they go through a hard time, laugh when they laugh and be filled with joy when they are joyful (Romans 12:15). You become empathetic to each other along the way.